Monday, 15 July 2013

Kayaking king

WALT choose words that describe a moment (in an exciting way) for the reader
  • begins in the action
  • present tense (I am, not I was)
  • short, sharp sentences
  • strong verbs
  • uses the senses (look, feel, hear, taste, smell)
  • language features (simile, alliteration, onomatopoeia, metaphor)
  • show personality (sounds like you, humour, feelings, exaggeration) Kayaking king

Me and Marcus were going kayaking and was pretty fun.The after I got to go with Inderpreet he was funny and we went to go in a kayak and we had to get Tevas dad David. He was just too funny Ha!!! Ha!!! Ha!!! Me and Inderpreet laughed and Inderpreet lied down in the kayak. We're not going to get him I said so we looked at the clouds and Inderpreet said pretty cloud it was hilarious. David was close to us and I just felt excited then I pretended that I was tired and I pounced out like a Tiger roar!!! I just nearly got him but I did not make it. I suffered when I jumped. We went out of the boat. We put out the kayaks again and get ready we drift off into the lake and this time I could go by myself or I could also go with a partner but I chose by myself. Then I got splashed. Splish splosh went the water. It was fun.


  1. Wow Dylan!
    Sounds like you had lots of fun with Inderpreet.
    I like how you said that the clouds were pretty!
    What an awesome piece of writing.
    Well done:-)

  2. Awesome Dylan I thought that you wouldn't of tagged me but you did you are really good at kayaking. I also loved how you said that you drifted into the lake that was great that part. Great job keep it up Dylan.


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